Pure=Vegan

And Haskell counts as vegetarian because it keeps side effects in monads.

Slashdotted! (Or: a list)

Not really. But at least they discuss the ultimate RISC. Anyway, I've been making a list of the ultimate programming paradigms. Everything is a(n): (carefully sorted alphabetically so you don't feel they are prioritized)

• actor (Erlang)
• algorithm (Python)
• application (iPhone)
• argument (like for a method)
• array (Lisp)
• aspect (AspectJ)
• associative array (JavaScript)
• capability (E)
• code (Lisp)
• component (XPCOM)
• concept (CoP)
• constraint (Prolog)
• coroutine
• data (Lisp)
• delegate (C#)
• documentation (Perl)
• DSL
• enumeration
• environment (bash)
• event (Reactive programming)
• file (GNU/Linux)
• filter
• function (lambda calculus)
• generator
• graph
• Lisp (Lisp)
• list (Lisp)
• macro (Lisp)
• map
• message (Smalltalk)
• module (Ada)
• monad (Haskell)
• object (Smalltalk)
• operator (C++)
• package (Java)
• paradigm
• pattern
• picture
• platform (Java/Mono/CLR/LLVM/Parrot)
• procedure (BASIC)
• program
• prototype (says the entrepreneur)
• query (SQL)
• reference (C)
• rule (Prolog)
• stack
• stream (pLucid)
• string (Tcl)
• syntax sugar (Perl)
• table (SQL)
• template (C++)
• TeX (TeX)
• text (TeX)
• transaction (SQL)
• tree (Lisp)
• type
• value (first-class programming)
• variable
• white box

I also came up with a list of adjectives. Everything is:

• abstract
• Algol-like
• annotated
• cross-platform
• easy (once you know how)
• encapsulated
• explicit
• generic
• high-level
• incomplete
• large
• local
• (un?)provable
• pure
• resource-limited
• scripted

Anyway, expect a post for each one of these eventually.